Just Talking Out Loud

Well since I now spend all my days with two little ones and little adult conversation, I thought I would just let out some things that have been on my mind. For starters, I've really been thinking a lot about my brother, Michael. I miss him so very much and so sad that he won't know my kids. He would of been such a great uncle. He's always loved kids and really dreamed of having a family. I'm so sad that he never got to experience the joy of holding his own little one. He's been showing up a lot in my dreams and sometimes my mom and I have the same dream about him. I feel like God is letting him say hi to us. I pray that I never stop having those dreams even though I wake up in the morning really missing him and a little sad that it was only a dream. Michael was the type to make sure everyone was ok. It doesn't surprise me that he is trying to tell me that he is in a good place. Anyway on to other things. I hate to complain because I know that there are so many other people out there far worse than me but this week was really stressful. I got a breast infection on one side then two days later got it on the other. It's so hard to be patient and loving to both kids when you're exhausted but even worse when you feel like you have the worse flu of your life. To top it off, Charlie does have reflux. We weren't sure for a couple of weeks because he doesn't spit up much but after this week I finally talked to the doctor about it and he confirmed that it was indeed reflux. Instead of spitting up, acid just sits in the back of his throat so he screams every time I try to feed him. The last couple of days I've been feeding him in a different position which is helping but very uncomfortable and I don't know how I will feed him this way anywhere else but home. And the little fart won't take a bottle so I'm stuck at home. On the other hand, Abby's been a real trooper. Poor thing she watches TV from the time she gets up till she goes to bed. I guess I'm lucky that she will do that. We did go get her birthday present early and went ahead and gave it to her. It's a kitchen and she loves it. We have more fun playing with it with her. She's also such a little mommy. She really tries to comfort Charlie when he's crying. Anyway, I'll stop complaining. I'm hoping to feel better over the weekend so I can get out of this house. I do need to take more pics of the little ones and will post some soon. And I saved the best for last, my sister, Cayce, had her baby boy yesterday and baby and mom are doing great. He is beautiful, of course and I can't wait to meet my new nephew. I'm glad that him and Charlie will be close in age.